Don't let this guy build your house.

Don't let this guy build your house.

If there's one thing we all do while building anything is two things. First, we make sure the house doesn't take up a lot of resources, and secondly, we make sure the house works like it's suppose to. Well, Meddyan has decided to build the mostinefficienthouse ever. We meant it. It's riddled with furnances, bookshelves, workbenches, and the like. The door, itself, is made out ofobsidian. Talk about waiting to get in, you'd have to punch your way for 2 minutes. At any rate, this house is made out of the most uncommon materrials. The kicker is that it took 1280 types of blocks to create and and the house has 200 blocks total.

First, Meddyan says:

I see people make their homes out of a lot of different materials. Some care little for aesthetics, and just use dirt, because it's cheap and plentiful. Others like style, so they choose wood, despite its usefullness in crafting and general flammability. Then there are the paranoid, who use obsidian, because damned if a creeper is going to ruin their hard work. Me? I decided to do something completly different.

This is a house made out of uncommon materials. This is a house that has zero practical value.

This is not the house jack built. This is the house inefficiency built.

This is the exterior. The walls required a printing press to produce. Jukeboxes line the doorway. And the door is 1-metre thick pure obsidian. It will take you nearly two minutes to punch your way inside, because you used all your diamonds on the jukeboxes.

"Honey, I'm home... finally..."

Here is the interior. Lighting is provided by a lava-fueled wall mounted furnace, because torches are for wimps. The floor is a lovely checkerboard of workbenches and gold blocks. Everyone knows that the best flooring requires hours of mining away in the underground. The wall chests cannot be accessed without first destroying the bookcase above it. Since bookcases cannot be reclaimed, every time you want to fetch something, you have to re-write several novels afterwards. Finally, note the stair case of furnaces. This staircase is awesome, it eats other staircases for breakfast.

Literally, it eats other staircases to cook my breakfast.

The lazy amongst us would probably note that the floor underneath the staircases cannot be seen, and would elect to fill it with dirt, reasoning that there is no point wasting materials no one can see.


This house was not made by one of those people.

Here we have the roof-top view. Want to know why there are no trees at all? They were all cut down just to the build the roof.


Bookcases have a TNT resistance of 7.5. What this means is that every creeper attack will resemble the aftermath of the Library of Alexandria disaster.

"Shit, there goes the entire Science Fiction section and half the works of Shakespeare..."

Finally, a fun fact: this house is comprised of 200 blocks, but took 1280 blocks to create. That's an inefficiency ratio of 0.15625 : 1

and now to make matters worse (or better for our enjoyment), he updated the house doing this:
Based upon some of the suggestions made, I have made several "improvements" to the house.

Here is the exterior, which has several new features.


1: We have a slow-sand moat, because it wasn't taking long enough to get into the house when you're being chased by 3 creepers, half a dozen zombies and a skeleton rider.
2: There is a burning doormat, now you have to try and punch through the obsidian doorwhile on fire.
3: A new TNT rooftop storage system, which we'll get to later.
4: The sides have been 'decorated' with ladders and signs featuring misleading, useless, and generally terrible Minecraft advice (you may need to click and view this one fullscreen)


Inside the house a minecart transportation system has been implemented, making travel within the house much more ridiculous. The track was carefully calibrated to take the least optimal route to the stairs. Sometimes it won't even make it that far.


A new basement was also added, but where's the entrance?


To access the basement, you must first destroy the staircase to the roof. This house allows only one staircase to be functional at any one time.


Down in the basement, we see it has been converted into an underground wheat farm, lit by jack o'lanterns. The farm layout is not designed in any logical or useful fashion. Cactus blocks serve as the path between crop blocks. This means that 90% of the harvest will be destroyed and you'll lose more health collecting the wheat than you'd ever hope to gain back. You can avoid the cactus by leaping from crop block to crop block, but that will ruin the tilled soil and you'll then be required to fetch a hoe from the rooftop storage.


Which requires that you must first destory the entire house, collect all the scattered items, rebuild the house, and then painstakingly re-organise your storage all over again.

This is what happens when you don't want to walk on cactus, you wuss.

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